Captain M gave me a glorious day off today (though the weather has not been glorious, ick). Went to a local eatery for lunch by myself, it was loooovely.
As I’m sitting there, two 20ish girls sit down next to me and start talking loudly. Both are overweight, one a lot more than the other. The Biggest Girl starts telling the other about her “boyfriend”. “He won’t text or email me, he only direct messages me through Twitter, is that weird? And he only DM’s me when he wants me for sex. Ugh. I’m thinking of dumping him. He is soooo rude. But he just DM’d me. Do you think I should meet him? He wants to come to my place. He’s being so sweet about it, maybe I should this time. I wish he’d text me instead.”
Me: *silently judging, chewing on my shrimp fried rice, trying not to explode*